Big Money, No Whammies

Consider yourselves blessed, dear readers, for this eve, a new things fall apart gimmick befalls you. It is with great pride that we introduce "Box Office Psychic," wherein we attempt to predict the opening weekend earnings for a major motion picture release.

In the crystal ball this week, Fahrenheit 9/11; from apple of the progressive eye and all around fat dope, Michael Moore.

Closing my eyes... concept of time... fading... future becoming... clearer.

Fahrenheit 9/11 weekend box office total gross: $81 million.

You may ask yourself, why are we comfortable making such a bold prediction?

From Reuters:

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Director Michael Moore's controversial documentary "Fahrenheit 9/11" has turned on the box office heat in its first day breaking single-day records at the two New York City cinemas where it played.

The movie, which aims a critical eye at U.S. President George W. Bush and his prosecution of the war in Iraq, sold $49,000 (35,000 pounds) worth of tickets at the Loew's Village 7 cinema, beating the venue's single-day record of $43,435 held by 1997's "Men in Black," according to distributors Lions Gate Films and IFC Films.

At the Lincoln Plaza cinema, "Fahrenheit 9/11" took in more than $30,000 to top the $24,013 set by "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" in 2000.

...

Online ticket service Fandango.com on Wednesday reported that "Fahrenheit 9/11" was making up 48 percent of advance ticket sales for the weekend ahead, compared to 11 percent for "Dodgeball" and 9 percent for next week's "Spider-Man 2."

Fahrenheit 9/11, like The Passion of The Christ, but with less Jesus.